6 January 2014
My apologies to the blog fans - if you've read the previous blog, you'll understand why this blog has been silent for a week or more.
The update:
I spent about 10 days in Bellingham spending time with my father and
family, helping out with whatever I could (including measuring our
mother's headstone so we could order a matching one), and the usual kind
of stuff one does in such a situation. I flew back to Bali, even
though it was apparent that our father was fading quickly - I promised
Richard I would only be gone ten days, and I stuck to that. Plus, one
has an obligation to one's family of origin, the family one is born into
- but one also has an obligation to the families we create.
So,
Richard met me at the airport, we took a taxi to the
neighbourhood of the hotel - and the roads were blocked for the big 31
December festival. We had to walk about a mile, in the rain, with
luggage
with a broken strap. And no raincoats. Yup, this seemed typical and
usual. The neighbourhood of Kuta has a big carnival and parade on 31
Dec., and this was why we had planned to be in Kuta for the date - and,
given the flight schedule and the traffic, we missed all the people in
traditional clothing and costumes, and all the dancing. Oh well.
The
evening
was full of fireworks everywhere - people shooting off all kinds of
things that would go boom, flash a rocket to the sky, and explode with a
crash and sparks and colours flying everywhere! We actually saw some
young men with a huge metal tube of fireworks, larger than a baseball
bat, holding it up over their heads in the middle of the road, shooting
fireworks high into the sky - and of course we stopped to watch the
craziness.
It
was several hours of nonstop blasts and rockets and fireworks, then
everything escalating and going off all together at midnight, up and
down the coastline that we could see from our balcony (it was raining)
- all amidst thunder and lightening! Really impressive! (And the
photos are all lifted from the internet, my camera doesn't do well with night photos.)
Got
up the next morning to a message from my middle brother that Dad passed
away about 2 PM on Dec 31. Faster than expected. And maybe I
should have just stayed. But I promised Richard I'd only be gone 10
days, so I was. As I said, I chose the obligation to the family we've
created.
So,
well, this is a travel blog, not a personal journal, even though there
is that aspect of it too. Anyone who has lost a parent knows how it
feels, how part of the world just seems empty.
But
being in Bali, well, it's another experience. It sort of gives me an
insight into the offerings for ancestors that is part of the Balinese
Hindu tradition. Because my brothers and nephews and I had a Greek
dinner in honour of our father, who was a Fulbright scholar in Greece
one year and the three of us went along with him. (Mom and two siblings
stayed in the US for a variety of reasons.) As we ate the Greek foods
that Dad always enjoyed, we reminisced about our year in Athens, and the
foods, and the experiences, and our father's horrible Greek
pronunciation.
And
isn't that what the offerings to the spirits and ancestors are all
about? Not so much physically feeding them, but connecting to the
experiences and memories we hold in our hearts, as we remember our loved
ones.
So,
while it is a painful experience to lose someone, well, it has
definitely given me a deeper understanding of this part of Balinese
culture.
On a brighter note, we both have enjoyed Bali, and the fireworks for New Year's Eve sort of embodied the Balinese way - there was probably some sort of organization of the community-run fireworks, but there were so many independent fireworks and individuals setting off various other fireworks that it was all some kind of beautiful chaos.
I think that sums up Bali - beautiful chaos. The roads are congested,
motorbikes go in both directions on one way streets, shrines are overflowing with offerings that spill out onto the sidewalk and street, and sometimes one can't identify a building as a house or temple or shrine - and yet, it all fits together into a beautiful picture, like pieces of a puzzle, each piece it's own
little bit of beauty, from the colourful clothes of the motorbike
riders to the flowers and foods in the offerings to the exuberant
structure of the architecture - it's all part of the beautiful chaos.
Phebe, I'm sorry to learn of your father's passing; I was in Guam for the past 10+ days and when I came home, my mom told me. I'm glad you came home to spend some time with him. I do think that's important.
ReplyDeleteI'm loving your blog! Thailand seems so colorful --perfect for an artist like you.